Starbucks

By mendeaux

I love Starbucks. I really do. The best drink in existence is a Starbucks Venti® Latte with 3 shots of espresso (notice the correct spelling of the word “espresso” – it’s not eXpresso people! C’mon, get it right!).

However, I do have a little complaint about the drive-thru at Starbucks. Their opening greeting sucks.

A typical conversation at any other drive-thru goes something like this:

“Welcome to (Fill-In-The-Blank-Restaurant), may I take your order please?”

“Yes, I’d like a…”

Not at Starbucks. Oh no. Here’s what you get there:

“Thank you for choosing Starbucks, my name is Bambi. How are you doing today?”

“Uh. Er. Um. Ok, I guess.”

Followed by an uncomfortable silence that stretches on for several seconds.

Why are they asking how I’m doing? Do they know me? They obviously don’t care about the answer to the question, judging by the long uncomfortable silence. I wonder how they’d react if I told them I was dying of some rare incurable disease, but if I could just get a decent Frappuccino® I could pull through. Why ask a question if you’re not really interested in the answer? And if you’re not interested in the answer, for heaven’s sake ask me a question that you really are interested in, like what would I like to drink!

Sorry. It’s early and I haven’t had my latte yet.

4 Responses to “Starbucks”

  1. Margaret Says:

    In-N-Out does the same thing. Initially you are taken aback, but after a few more visits, when you are in a forgiving mood, you just throw it back at them, because, frankly, they aren’t expecting it either!

  2. Hitech Stupidity Says:

    Me too.

  3. Karen Mitchell Says:

    I missed my Starbucks stop today
    And I am disappointed;
    I like my morning caffeine fix
    It makes me less annoying;
    It wakes me up so I can think
    With thoughts that make me want to sing
    Inspired, alive, the world is mine
    The caffe latte suits me fine;
    I’m motivated come what may
    And I can face today;
    Yeah, that’s what Starbucks does for me
    Without it, well we’ll have to see;
    I’m not sure how this day will go
    Check back if you must know.

    Karen Mitchell
    copyright 2006

  4. Jean Says:

    Seriously, I hope you do stand-up somewhere. If not, you should be.

Leave a Reply